alex has really not been blogging much in this world, but he hasn't been able to stop singing this song. I still can't see the educational value of this thing, but it's catchy!
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Stop trying to make 'Girlicious' happen!
Ok, so maybe Season 5 isn't the LAST season, but it is for me. If you take my Tim Gunn to L.A., you take the very muslin from my dress form. I won't freaking have it!
That said, Bravo is really taking the low-road by under promoting nearly everything about its once glorious flagship. It's a sad death rattle, really, but it's all I have!
Time now for the weekly P.R. update with my dear friend Monrovia Staples-Soliloquy, who lives far, far away in Our Nation's Capital. Stapes-Solil is really 95% of the reason why I keep up with the show these days. It's just too much of a let down if I don't have something to talk about with her on Thursdays!
One thing you should note: I don't bother to learn designers names for the first two episodes. Stapes-Solil is awesome at learning everyone really fast, but frankly, I don't care about your ass until we reach the point where you ALL stay on the runway for the critique. Sorry.
Laura: Soooooooooo ?
Laura: I have one thing to say:
Laura: "Stop trying to make Girliocious" happen
Monrovia Staples-Soliloquy: ohhhh yes
M.S-S.: also his outfit looked like donald duck flew headfirst into her crotch
Laura: I mean... I even struggle to use the old "at least he has a point of view" line
Laura: Because that didn't show anything but a whole mess of crazy
M.S-S: word
M.S-S: and he's annoying
Laura: Plus, he looks like an orange, greasy gargoyle
M.S-S: and tanning is stupid
Laura: Word to your word
M.S-S: i did like the winning outfit's skirt
M.S-S: bodice was ... interesting
Laura: I also didn't care for the coffee filter bobs
Laura: Boobs, even
Laura: I liked the skirt and loved the notebook hook and eyes
M.S-S: yes. same here
M.S-S: i thought the cup dress was creative
M.S-S: but his model was....a little curvy? maybe?
Laura: I really loved the girl that used the red bouncy ball bodice with the asymmetrical stripped skirt
Laura: I really liked the cup dress and the model really neede boods for it
Laura: But something was wierd in the waist
Laura: It was a little andre's topiary dress
M.S-S: oh i loved the bouncy ball dress too
Laura: It was really my fave
Boing, boing!
M.S-S: i also liked the girl that looked like bettie page...can't remember her name
M.S-S: kendall maybe?
M.S-S: kenley?
Laura: All the girls are so waifey and greasy, it's hard to tell them apart
Laura: And suede needs to die
Laura: ASAP
Laura: I can't deal with that shit
M.S-S: yes! i was like, is this the season of skinny hipster girls?
Laura: Seriously. Quirky flower head girl is a little contrived
Laura: She said in one little questionaire segment that the ultimate fashion basic is high waisted, back skinny jeans
Laura: Liiiike... How not fashion forward
M.S-S: chyeaahh
M.S-S: no
M.S-S: i reaaaaaally don't like the hipster thing
Laura: And how NOT appropriate for everyone
M.S-S: just...be normal for cheese's sake
Laura: It's freaking everywhere in Chicago
Laura: It's crazy how they are anti mainstream... In the EXACT SAME WAY
M.S-S: word
M.S-S: it's really prevalent in certain parts of dc
M.S-S: the rest of dc is a bastion of peppiness
Laura: Yeah, Chi-town is pretty much all preps doing designer hipster
Laura: Which is freaking rough
M.S-S: i wish i could remember more of the outfits from the show
M.S-S: there were soooo many they're all running together
Laura: Ok, and also...
Laura: The loser guy?
Laura: WHAT in the hell
Laura: You know what killed me? The rubber gloves
Even the MODEL looks sad.
M.S-S: ohhhhhhhhhh man
M.S-S: YES
Laura: It was totally morgue chic
M.S-S: and he was like, it's an outfit for going out on the town
M.S-S: nooo
M.S-S: unless you have to hustle out the door right after scrubbing your bathtub
Laura: It's an outfit to wear during the Andromeda Strain or Outbreak
M.S-S: hahaah
M.S-S: yes
M.S-S: that should totally be a challenge ps
Laura: It made me sad because I love me some Gaysians
Laura: (Gay Asians)
Laura: And the footage from his store and some really nice dresses
Laura: Oooh, good idea
M.S-S: i like Gaysians too
M.S-S: once we were out and saw a Gaysian peeing on a car outside the bar
M.S-S: so i wrote a poem:
Laura: HAA let's hear it
M.S-S: goodnight moon, goodnight bar, goodnight gaysian peeeing on car
Laura: (*Snif-Sniff*) I smell a Pulitzer
M.S-S: thrilling
M.S-S: and what about joan jett and her trash b ags?
Laura: Leather daddy chic. I'm over it. Jeffery already won, let's be real. How can the same asthetic be cutting edge every other season.
M.S-S: ooooooh leather! how...edgy
Laura: For 1973
Laura: I'm just saying, if the show is about the next step in fashion, I don't want someone who is confused by a garbage bag
M.S-S: word
M.S-S: this afternoon i will look at the outfits again and probably have better judgments
Laura: Me, too. These have just been my initial thoughts on the bus
M.S-S: i really did like the bouncy ball dress though
M.S-S: i thought the yellow dress with vegetables was really striking
Laura: I think I like that girl.
Laura: I was afraid of Shitangi 2
: me too
M.S-S: she looks like jennifer hudson
M.S-S: like, a lot
Laura: Without relaxer
Laura: Also the quiet guy who wears ken shorts, the 23 year old, is CREEPY
Laura: He reminds me of Jeffery Dahmer
M.S-S: YES
M.S-S: and they didn't focus on him at all so he would appear randomly in the backgrouund and cause me to shriek
Laura: He's probably sweet but he still scares me
Fin
That said, Bravo is really taking the low-road by under promoting nearly everything about its once glorious flagship. It's a sad death rattle, really, but it's all I have!
Time now for the weekly P.R. update with my dear friend Monrovia Staples-Soliloquy, who lives far, far away in Our Nation's Capital. Stapes-Solil is really 95% of the reason why I keep up with the show these days. It's just too much of a let down if I don't have something to talk about with her on Thursdays!
One thing you should note: I don't bother to learn designers names for the first two episodes. Stapes-Solil is awesome at learning everyone really fast, but frankly, I don't care about your ass until we reach the point where you ALL stay on the runway for the critique. Sorry.
Laura: Soooooooooo ?
Laura: I have one thing to say:
Laura: "Stop trying to make Girliocious" happen
Monrovia Staples-Soliloquy: ohhhh yes
M.S-S.: also his outfit looked like donald duck flew headfirst into her crotch
Laura: I mean... I even struggle to use the old "at least he has a point of view" line
Laura: Because that didn't show anything but a whole mess of crazy
M.S-S: word
M.S-S: and he's annoying
Laura: Plus, he looks like an orange, greasy gargoyle
M.S-S: and tanning is stupid
Laura: Word to your word
M.S-S: i did like the winning outfit's skirt
M.S-S: bodice was ... interesting
Laura: I also didn't care for the coffee filter bobs
Laura: Boobs, even
Laura: I liked the skirt and loved the notebook hook and eyes
M.S-S: yes. same here
M.S-S: i thought the cup dress was creative
M.S-S: but his model was....a little curvy? maybe?
Laura: I really loved the girl that used the red bouncy ball bodice with the asymmetrical stripped skirt
Laura: I really liked the cup dress and the model really neede boods for it
Laura: But something was wierd in the waist
Laura: It was a little andre's topiary dress
M.S-S: oh i loved the bouncy ball dress too
Laura: It was really my fave
Boing, boing!
M.S-S: i also liked the girl that looked like bettie page...can't remember her name
M.S-S: kendall maybe?
M.S-S: kenley?
Laura: All the girls are so waifey and greasy, it's hard to tell them apart
Laura: And suede needs to die
Laura: ASAP
Laura: I can't deal with that shit
M.S-S: yes! i was like, is this the season of skinny hipster girls?
Laura: Seriously. Quirky flower head girl is a little contrived
Laura: She said in one little questionaire segment that the ultimate fashion basic is high waisted, back skinny jeans
Laura: Liiiike... How not fashion forward
M.S-S: chyeaahh
M.S-S: no
M.S-S: i reaaaaaally don't like the hipster thing
Laura: And how NOT appropriate for everyone
M.S-S: just...be normal for cheese's sake
Laura: It's freaking everywhere in Chicago
Laura: It's crazy how they are anti mainstream... In the EXACT SAME WAY
M.S-S: word
M.S-S: it's really prevalent in certain parts of dc
M.S-S: the rest of dc is a bastion of peppiness
Laura: Yeah, Chi-town is pretty much all preps doing designer hipster
Laura: Which is freaking rough
M.S-S: i wish i could remember more of the outfits from the show
M.S-S: there were soooo many they're all running together
Laura: Ok, and also...
Laura: The loser guy?
Laura: WHAT in the hell
Laura: You know what killed me? The rubber gloves
Even the MODEL looks sad.
M.S-S: YES
Laura: It was totally morgue chic
M.S-S: and he was like, it's an outfit for going out on the town
M.S-S: nooo
M.S-S: unless you have to hustle out the door right after scrubbing your bathtub
Laura: It's an outfit to wear during the Andromeda Strain or Outbreak
M.S-S: hahaah
M.S-S: yes
M.S-S: that should totally be a challenge ps
Laura: It made me sad because I love me some Gaysians
Laura: (Gay Asians)
Laura: And the footage from his store and some really nice dresses
Laura: Oooh, good idea
M.S-S: i like Gaysians too
M.S-S: once we were out and saw a Gaysian peeing on a car outside the bar
M.S-S: so i wrote a poem:
Laura: HAA let's hear it
M.S-S: goodnight moon, goodnight bar, goodnight gaysian peeeing on car
Laura:
M.S-S
M.S-S
Laura: Leather daddy chic. I'm over it. Jeffery already won, let's be real. How can the same asthetic be cutting edge every other season.
Laura: For 1973
Laura: I'm just saying, if the show is about the next step in fashion, I don't want someone who is confused by a garbage bag
Laura: Me, too. These have just been my initial thoughts on the bus
Laura: I think I like that girl.
Laura: I was afraid of Shitangi 2
Laura: Without relaxer
Laura: Also the quiet guy who wears ken shorts, the 23 year old, is CREEPY
Laura: He reminds me of Jeffery Dahmer
Laura: He's probably sweet but he still scares me
Fin
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
L'eau Expensive
Dear Reader (and I do mean that to be singular. Hi, mom!) -
You may or may not know this about me:
I. Love. Diet. Coke.
Thank you, Natalie Dee.
This was not always the case - I was a Sprite girl all through childhood. Caffeine was never my thing until I began working at a Summer Camp with a daily "Pop Stop" - a time after swimming to ensure hydration. It was at camp that I was introduced to the wonder of Diet Coke by my good friend Katie, who was and still is a Diet Coke master. She has a true appreciation of the product far beyond my meager palette.
This rolled into college where I could not deal with that hip "coffee" stuff that all the cool kids were drinking. I have always associated coffee with adulthood - and my body's visceral, poisonous reaction to it has made me feel like a permanent minor for years and years. Ergo - it was to Diet Coke (and, in moments of sheer desperation Mountain Dew) that I would turn during my all nighters and early mornings. This practice has continued into my professional life, culminating in the worst indulgences since coming to my current job. There's a well stocked fridge with an honor system. It has been bad, bad, bad.
During this time, I have been all to aware (thanks mostly to the constant bitching from my friends and loved ones) that diet anything will kill you and aspertaime is formaldehyde and blah, Blah, BLAH. It would be impossible not to worry about that, as I can not stop worrying about the little bits of dust in my keyboard and how my ears are uneven so my sunglasses are crooked and touch my cheeks and give me acne and how rough my feet get in the summer and...
You get it. I worry. I have been freaking out about my teeth mainly and even tried to start drinking my 48 ounces (I KNOW, IT'S BAD! LAY OFF!) through a straw. But now, I think I've solved the problem!
You may or may not know this about me:
I. Love. Diet. Coke.
Thank you, Natalie Dee.
This rolled into college where I could not deal with that hip "coffee" stuff that all the cool kids were drinking. I have always associated coffee with adulthood - and my body's visceral, poisonous reaction to it has made me feel like a permanent minor for years and years. Ergo - it was to Diet Coke (and, in moments of sheer desperation Mountain Dew) that I would turn during my all nighters and early mornings. This practice has continued into my professional life, culminating in the worst indulgences since coming to my current job. There's a well stocked fridge with an honor system. It has been bad, bad, bad.
During this time, I have been all to aware (thanks mostly to the constant bitching from my friends and loved ones) that diet anything will kill you and aspertaime is formaldehyde and blah, Blah, BLAH. It would be impossible not to worry about that, as I can not stop worrying about the little bits of dust in my keyboard and how my ears are uneven so my sunglasses are crooked and touch my cheeks and give me acne and how rough my feet get in the summer and...
You get it. I worry. I have been freaking out about my teeth mainly and even tried to start drinking my 48 ounces (I KNOW, IT'S BAD! LAY OFF!) through a straw. But now, I think I've solved the problem!
God Bless La Croix!
This may be an elitest looking POS product, but it has a nice bubbly kick and I can trick myself into thinking that it's pop. For now. It's working out for me -- I'm even tricking myself into thinking I've had caffeine! Glorious. And I almost don't even miss the D.C.
Alright fine... you know me too well.
This may be an elitest looking POS product, but it has a nice bubbly kick and I can trick myself into thinking that it's pop. For now. It's working out for me -- I'm even tricking myself into thinking I've had caffeine! Glorious. And I almost don't even miss the D.C.
Alright fine... you know me too well.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Dick the Docent
A man by the name of Dick sits across from me on the bus.He is, as indicated by his nametag, bright orange hat and standard issue safari vest, a docent for the Lincoln Park Zoo. Dick carries many tote bags and is festivly adorned with buttons of polar bears.
Dick is my favorite.
Dick is my favorite.
Monday, June 16, 2008
... Whoops
Hello...
I know it's been a while. I'm very, very sorry to the five of you who accidentally stumbled upon our little blog one time. In our defense, s***s been going down - but in a good way!
We moved in together (I'll pause for your gasps) into a tiiiiny little apartment downtown almost three weeks ago. As has been pointed out to us multiple times, if a relationship can survive a move, we are golden. So far, so good - although, I have been reminded that just because we live together now does not mean that we need to be in the same room/ will magically like the same TV.
That being said... alex finds himself at home during the days now, and just in time for the Euro 2008 and let's just be honest, it's really amazing. Normally, the only Soccer I watch is played by my 12 year old brother or an Xbox game - and it's just not quite the same.
I know it's been a while. I'm very, very sorry to the five of you who accidentally stumbled upon our little blog one time. In our defense, s***s been going down - but in a good way!
We moved in together (I'll pause for your gasps) into a tiiiiny little apartment downtown almost three weeks ago. As has been pointed out to us multiple times, if a relationship can survive a move, we are golden. So far, so good - although, I have been reminded that just because we live together now does not mean that we need to be in the same room/ will magically like the same TV.
That being said... alex finds himself at home during the days now, and just in time for the Euro 2008 and let's just be honest, it's really amazing. Normally, the only Soccer I watch is played by my 12 year old brother or an Xbox game - and it's just not quite the same.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Bret and Jemaine in T-minus 24 hours!
Yes, that's right. The inspiration for this blog's title, Flight of the Conchords, are coming to Chi-town tomorrow!!!
I actually saw a tour bus go through the historic neighborhood that I happen to work in. I bet it's them and their manager wanted to take them on an architetural tour.I can't figure out what in the hell to wear, as I do not want to appear lame as they clap eyes with me in the very last row of the theater. Yeah.
Blogging + Blackberry = huge nerd
Bye, Bret.
I actually saw a tour bus go through the historic neighborhood that I happen to work in. I bet it's them and their manager wanted to take them on an architetural tour.I can't figure out what in the hell to wear, as I do not want to appear lame as they clap eyes with me in the very last row of the theater. Yeah.
Blogging + Blackberry = huge nerd
Bye, Bret.
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Car Talk: Seal
The following is a paraphrased conversation held between the two writers of this blog driving home from a nice afternoon at the Chicago Botanic Gardens and a scenic drive through the North Shore at approximately 8:45 p.m.:
[ Song starts up on the radio]
alex: Do you know what song this is?
Laura: Yes.
alex: What song is it?
Laura: It's that one from the thing... I know it!
a: It's "Fly Like an Eagle" by The Steve Miller Band.
L: Yeah, I knew that... only I preferred the Seal version better, which is why I couldn't come up with it right away.
[Sidebar: I could not actually identify the song, but alex likes to push you in to admitting that you don't know something he knows everything about, hence the above artful dodging]
a: From the Space Jam soundtrack??
L: Yeah! My sister loved that soundtrack when she was younger, and I really liked that song.
a: And R. Kelly's "I Believe I Can Fl--"
L: STOP!!! I hate that song.
a: Apparently, Seal has a large package... Apparently....
L: ... Obviously.
a: I'm just saying, that's what I hear...
L: I don't think that was ever really in question. Seal is hot -- I think so, because Laura Winslow thought so in that episode where she goes to the Seal concert and remarks how "Fooooiiiine" he is. Since we have the same name, I agree.
a: Yeeeah. Remember "Kiss from a Rose"?
[Long story omitted about how my local morning zoo show would play the same line up every morning and I woke up to aforementioned song almost every morning of sixth grade. Actually, that's pretty much the story...]
L: I still really like that song, even though it makes me remember almost every article of clothing I had in sixth grade.
a: I loved when he harmonized....
L&a in perfect harmony: "I.... IIIII've been Kissed by a rose"
a: "On the grave" L: "On the flame!"
L: .... Hmmm, it's probably on the grave. I honestly don't know any for the words from that song... just the melody.
a: Me neither.
L: "Theeeere's a leaning tower on the wrong side of me" wait... or maybe it's "Lonely Tower" [Totally wrong. Totally, totally wrong]
a: I really don't know...
[Silence follows then we both shout in perfect unison]
My power, My Pleasure, MY PAIIIN!
a: BAYYY A BAAAAY
L: Shooba dooba lone addiction skibaskiba ba bam... A Did you know... that when it snows... my eyes become wide and the light that you shine can be seen?
a: I think it's "My eyes become large"[He's right, once again]
L: Ew, that sounds weird... Welp, I just figured out what you'll be spending your last four dollars in ITunes on...
a: Heidi Klum's one lucky bitch.
L: He's totally Foooine.
[Fin]
[ Song starts up on the radio]
alex: Do you know what song this is?
Laura: Yes.
alex: What song is it?
Laura: It's that one from the thing... I know it!
a: It's "Fly Like an Eagle" by The Steve Miller Band.
L: Yeah, I knew that... only I preferred the Seal version better, which is why I couldn't come up with it right away.
[Sidebar: I could not actually identify the song, but alex likes to push you in to admitting that you don't know something he knows everything about, hence the above artful dodging]
a: From the Space Jam soundtrack??
L: Yeah! My sister loved that soundtrack when she was younger, and I really liked that song.
a: And R. Kelly's "I Believe I Can Fl--"
L: STOP!!! I hate that song.
a: Apparently, Seal has a large package... Apparently....
L: ... Obviously.
a: I'm just saying, that's what I hear...
L: I don't think that was ever really in question. Seal is hot -- I think so, because Laura Winslow thought so in that episode where she goes to the Seal concert and remarks how "Fooooiiiine" he is. Since we have the same name, I agree.
a: Yeeeah. Remember "Kiss from a Rose"?
[Long story omitted about how my local morning zoo show would play the same line up every morning and I woke up to aforementioned song almost every morning of sixth grade. Actually, that's pretty much the story...]
L: I still really like that song, even though it makes me remember almost every article of clothing I had in sixth grade.
a: I loved when he harmonized....
L&a in perfect harmony: "I.... IIIII've been Kissed by a rose"
a: "On the grave" L: "On the flame!"
L: .... Hmmm, it's probably on the grave. I honestly don't know any for the words from that song... just the melody.
a: Me neither.
L: "Theeeere's a leaning tower on the wrong side of me" wait... or maybe it's "Lonely Tower" [Totally wrong. Totally, totally wrong]
a: I really don't know...
[Silence follows then we both shout in perfect unison]
My power, My Pleasure, MY PAIIIN!
a: BAYYY A BAAAAY
L: Shooba dooba lone addiction skibaskiba ba bam... A Did you know... that when it snows... my eyes become wide and the light that you shine can be seen?
a: I think it's "My eyes become large"[He's right, once again]
L: Ew, that sounds weird... Welp, I just figured out what you'll be spending your last four dollars in ITunes on...
a: Heidi Klum's one lucky bitch.
L: He's totally Foooine.
[Fin]
Seal: Totally Foooine
Thursday, May 1, 2008
World Issue Alert: Congo
Today's World Issue is brought to you by the Diane Rehm Show from WAMU in Washington. I started listening to Diane Rehm on the world's tiniest NPR Station in Oxford, Ohio. Don't get me wrong, I love me some Chicago Public Radio, but I miss Diane's book reviews and Friday news round up... (Don't we all?)
I miss, therefore I podcast. Diane went for the serious issues on Monday, tackling Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and the terror that is everyday life for women in the Congo. John Prendergast and Linda Jackson were featured as her guests and, while I had hear whisperings of the atrocities, Linda's new film The Greatest Silence: Rape in the Congo is telling the story of survivors who have been abused and mutilated in a war that has claimed over five million lives. We can contribute by informing ourselves about what's happening to these woman and the context of all of this violence. Listening to the podcast is a great place to start - both panelists offer a concise history of the problems in Congo and refer to additional resources and NGO's that are working for these women and children.
Organizations to Look Into:
Women for Women International
ENOUGH Project
Amnesty International
I know that this blog is all over the place, but that's how life is. I might work in the non-profit sector and lean to the left politically, but I can also be frivolous, into material things and have a weird hobby. I think that's the paradox of being an informed individual in Western society. I've spent years feeling guilty, but now I just try to do what I do when I can and I'll try to work it all out into a nice little package later.
I miss, therefore I podcast. Diane went for the serious issues on Monday, tackling Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and the terror that is everyday life for women in the Congo. John Prendergast and Linda Jackson were featured as her guests and, while I had hear whisperings of the atrocities, Linda's new film The Greatest Silence: Rape in the Congo is telling the story of survivors who have been abused and mutilated in a war that has claimed over five million lives. We can contribute by informing ourselves about what's happening to these woman and the context of all of this violence. Listening to the podcast is a great place to start - both panelists offer a concise history of the problems in Congo and refer to additional resources and NGO's that are working for these women and children.
Organizations to Look Into:
Women for Women International
ENOUGH Project
Amnesty International
I know that this blog is all over the place, but that's how life is. I might work in the non-profit sector and lean to the left politically, but I can also be frivolous, into material things and have a weird hobby. I think that's the paradox of being an informed individual in Western society. I've spent years feeling guilty, but now I just try to do what I do when I can and I'll try to work it all out into a nice little package later.
From Women to Women's Mother's Day Card Campaign
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